Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Thank a liberal

I think I've posted or linked to this before, but I like it, so here it is again:

A day in the life of Joe Republican

Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.
With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to insure their safety and that they work as advertised.
All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too.
He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and how much it contained.
Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for laws to stop industries from polluting our air.
He walks to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.
Joe begins his workday. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal union members fought and died for these working standards.
Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.
It's noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression.
Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime.
Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards.
He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.
He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.
Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day. Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I have."


Blogger Liz said...

I like it just as much now as the last time you linked/posted it.

Self-made man. Bah!

5:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Joe only has those freedoms because his mom, luckily, did not choose to abort him. He's lucky.. if his mom was some bleeding heart liberal who didn't want a baby to interfere with her life plan, he'd have been sucked from her womb. Aren't choices grand!

5:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Joe only has those freedoms because his mom, luckily, did not choose to abort him. He's lucky.. if his mom was some bleeding heart liberal who didn't want a baby to interfere with her life plan, he'd have been sucked from her womb. Aren't choices grand!"

Actually Joe's mom was pro-choice, she CHOSE to have him. And then she aborted his brother who would have been a cold-hearted neo-con who would have voted to pollute the water so big business can make money, cut jobs and ship them overseas and then send everyone off to an unjust war. Choice is grand.

1:27 PM  
Blogger Jeremy said...

Love it... Funny thing is, this doesn't mention the roads, traffic signs/signals, or much of the other infrastructure that everyone of us uses everyday and that the evil government builds.

6:28 PM  
Blogger James said...

And thank a liberal for pointing out what evil people running corporations are, starting with those giants of industry like; John D. Rockefeller, whose streamlining of oil production in the 1880's reduced the cost of Kerosine from a dollar per gallon to just 10 cents (this was the main system of home lighting at the time).
Or that terror Andrew Carnegie, another person often vilified by the left. His organization genius resulted in the dropping of the price of steel rails from $160 a ton to just $17, allowing for a boom in building and transportation.
Both of these men criticized the accumulation of wealth for its own sake and together donated nearly a billion dollars to charity.
And then there is the New Deal, a program not dissimilar to today's Gov't programs, that many economists believe deepened and extended the Great Depression.
The bottom line is that Libs tend to take credit for anything that is good and blame conservatives for everything bad. Must be nice to look at everything through such rose colored glasses.

4:11 PM  
Blogger James said...

Oh, I forgot that evil man Joseph McCarthy, who is still demonized by the left. They say that he terrorized a nation, yet his opponents spoke freely about him. They blame him for blacklisting in Hollywood, yet that was the House that initiated and pursued that investigation.
Since that time, two major events have occured that prove most of what McCarty said was true; these being the release of classified intercepts of Soviet transmissions and the release of classified documents by the Russians after the fall of the Soviet Union.
Even liberal historian Nicholas Von Hoffman admitted in 1996 that McCarthy was still closer to the truth than those that ridiculed him.
Yet he is still the object of disstain by the left, who refuse to accept that not all conservatives are evil people.

4:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love it ! Very creative ! That's actually really cool Thanks.

10:36 AM  

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